What If...?

I was sitting alone in a quiet place surrounded only by my thoughts. You all know how much I don't cherish those moments. There is nothing worse than the nagging 'what ifs' that pummel themselves at us.

But what if...
I would have called more. What would Thanksgiving have been like? Would I be happy?
What if...
I would have stayed. What would I be doing?. Would I still feel as bitter as I did? Would I have a job now? Would I be in school for four or five or six or seven years?
What if...
I wouldn't have went to that shag. Would I feel a little empty inside? Would my long distance phone bill be through the roof?
What if...
I would have kept every single promise I ever made to myself. Would I still swear like a trooper? Would I be single? Would I be studying in a convent? Would I be running a marathon in June?
What if...
I went to Medical School. Would I get married? Would I have a family? Would I be a nervous breakdown waiting to happen? Would I...make the time for the things that matter?
What if...
I got married tomorrow and started having a family? Well, there'd be more mini me's and that just wouldn't be good. I just don't think I would be happy.
What if...
I composed a song that changed the world.
okay...that would never happen. But what if it changed just one person's world? Would it be worth it?
What if...
I saved a life? Then I would consider none of my efforts to be in vain.

Life really is too short...but I'm going to savor all of those fleeting moments.